Chapter 17-Plans, plans and more plans

Chapter 17-Plans, plans and more plans

Edward

I closed my bedroom door, no wait, our bedroom door. I wanted to jump, shout and squeal like a girl. Bella was back and we had just made love. I staggered back to lean against the wall, Bella was home. I was overwhelmed with emotions. I turned to see Esme walking up the stairs.

"Edward are you okay?" Her eyes jumped with emotion.

"I'm fine, I think. I just don't know how to process it all. I just feel so inadequate; can I do this right this time?" I searched her face; I knew her words could lie, but never her eyes. Esme truly had eyes that show her soul, and I knew if I could find the answer in there it was as good as true.

She smiled and pulled me into a hug.

"Edward, you love Bella with all of your soul, no matter what that is enough. You'll both make mistakes, but your love is strong enough to pull you both through anything. Just look at all you have been through already and yet here you are together. And, might I add you are looking pretty sexed up. So things can't be that bad." She lightly slapped my arm, and I'm sure she had a smile on her face, but I was too embarrassed to look at her face. I was embarrassed that Esme knew we had just had sex, and embarrassed that I was in an almost full-fledged panic attack at what I was feeling for Bella and our baby. I allowed her comfort to seep into me and warm me with all the possibilities of what we could be. How great it would be when we got to where ever 'there' was.

Alice came bouncing up the stairs and interrupted our moment, but that was okay. After all I was a man and we didn't need more than a few minutes of feminine bonding. Besides if Alice joined in she would want to start braiding each other's hair and painting someone's toenails. I needed to focus and start the plans for our baby's room.

"Alice I'm glad you're here I need to talk to both of you, come with me." I stated as I pulled away from Esme and lead them both towards the guest room down the hall. "What if we clean this room out and decorate it for the nursery?" I said as I flipped the light on. "Bella and I decided that we would stay here in Forks for the birth and then for a few months afterward. Bella wants to be with Charlie and I agree. Besides I figured that you all would not like us taking the baby and moving across country without you, so we need some baby space." Before I could even finish Esme and Alice both squealed and started bouncing around. "Ssshh, Bella is sleeping, and I'm sure she has had nowhere near enough for ages. Keep it down." I admonished.

"Oh, sorry, we couldn't help it." Alice murmured with a dreamy look in her eyes. She followed Esme into the center of the room and they both started talking about what color to paint and furniture placement, so I drifted out of the room and back downstairs. I needed at least one more man in the room with me; I could feel the estrogen leaking into my skin. I ran downstairs, and into the family room.

I was rewarded with Emmett, Jasper and Carlisle all three in the throes of a Guitar Hero battle. Carlisle was currently playing "You Give Love a Bad Name" and might I say kicking ass.

"Come on Eddiekins, so far Carlisle is wiping up the floor with us, we need your musical skills to tip the scales in our favor." Emmett couldn't stand to lose at anything, so I knew he was desperate to have help.

"I'll be right back, I need to speak to Rosalie for a minute and then I can."

"She is in the kitchen, hurry, like I said kicking our ass. Hurry!" Emmett yelled as I headed off to the kitchen.

Rosalie was leaned over in the refrigerator and didn't hear me come in. I cleared my throat and she looked over at me. "Rosalie, can I ask you for some help?" I hesitantly asked.

"Of course Edward, what do you need?" She responded.

"Bella and I have decided to stay here and have the baby, so we'll be turning the upstairs guest room into the nursery. We need some help ordering some furniture for the baby and Bella and I need a new bed. Mine isn't big enough, so do you mind helping me take care of some of that? I want to try to do this for Bella, and let her relax. I know she has been through a lot and I want to make the last few months of her pregnancy as easy as possible." I smiled at her, embarrassed at how girlie I sounded.

"Edward, that is so sweet. I would love to help you, but don't you think that you should be asking Alice or Esme, they are the more experienced shoppers?"

"Well, they are going to help as well, but I know I don't know what I'm doing. I'll need as much help as I can get, besides they both scare the hell out of me and I need someone on my team. You know, to help out vote them when they get a little too crazy."

She snorted and I realized she was just as scared of them as I was, but she responded to me, "Okay, team mate."

I let out a sigh of relief. "Can we start tomorrow morning, I need to order a new bed as soon as possible, or else I think I'm going to end up on the couch in my room. Who knew I would end up hating the bed I have loved for so long?" I let out a small laugh.

"Okay, we can start right after breakfast. I'll let Esme and Alice concentrate on the baby furniture and I'll help with your room. If you don't mind the suggestion, we need to order a whole new bedroom suite, yours is a little manly. I think that will save time in the long run, if you both have something you like you can keep it longer. Sound good?"

"Do you think that Bella will like that?" I asked, thankful for Rosalie's help.

"Oh yeah, leave that to me. Emmett has never been unhappy that I love our bedroom, and trust me I'll help you plan a room that Bella will love." She smiled a seductive smile, and winked at me. I gave her a quick hug and headed back to the family room.

"Edward, what the hell, you're too late!" Emmett bellowed, as Jasper laughed at him.

"Well we'll have to start all over, because the real Guitar Hero is here!" I danced around the room ala Rocky, with my fists in the air.

We played several more rounds and I was clearly in the lead when I saw Bella coming down the stairs, wiping her eyes. I jumped up and quickly made my way over to her.

"Bella, are you okay? Why are you up?" I questioned her.

"I needed to get something to drink and a little to eat. I skipped dinner in all of the excitement, and now we are starved." She said as she rubbed her stomach.

Esme came into the family room and dragged Bella off to the kitchen to feed her. Later I heard them at the computer oogling over baby furniture. I walked over to see what they were making a fuss over, and to see if Bella had anything she liked.

"What's all the fuss about?" I asked as I came up.

"Oh Edward, come look, this set is so pretty. I love the neutral colors." The excitement in Bella's voice was noticeable.

"Do you like the darker color furniture? Would you like the cherry or the set in black?" I questioned knowing that Alice was taking very close notes on what Bella liked.

"Well,l I think that the black set goes better with the bedding, what do you think?" She asked hesitantly as she bit on her lip.

"I love the black set, but is that okay for a girl? I don't know these kinds of things."

Esme jumped in to answer, and Bella and I both turned to her to hear her answer. "Black is very appropriate for girls, and I agree with Bella it goes so well with the bedding. I like it very much Bella." Esme smiled a very satisfied smile. I could only imagine the satisfaction she was getting from decorating the baby's room. I was glad we could give her that.

"Well, that's settled then." I nodded at Alice who was sitting in front of the computer.

"Okay, you ready for bed now?" I asked as she yawned.

She nodded and we said goodnight to everyone.

"Edward why don't you both sleep in the guest room for tonight, it has a bigger bed. I know Bella is not going to be comfortable with you in that small bed of yours." Esme called to us as we were heading up the stairs.

"Thanks," I offered back to her, as Bella blushed when she realized that all eyes were on the two of us. I chuckled and lead her upstairs. I stopped in my room; grabbed some pajama pants and we went into the guest bedroom. Bella sat down on the bed and called Charlie as I went in to the bathroom to change.

"Hey Dad, how are you?" I heard Bella ask. She waited for his response. Then she continued "I wanted to let you know that I'm staying here tonight. I fell asleep and just woke up to eat. I forgot all about dinner in all of the confusion. So sorry that it's so late, I just didn't want you to worry." She smiled at Charlie's response, and chuckled quietly. "I know, we worked everything out and we have a lot more to talk about tomorrow. We need to work through a lot of things but we have a great start. I think we will be fine." I sat beside her on the bed and heard Charlie saying he had to go in at two in the afternoon. "Well we'll come over and I'll make lunch for you before you go in, and we can talk for a while before you go to work, is that okay?" I heard Charlie agree, and then ask Bella if she was happy. "Everything is not completely ironed out but we are about half way there and yes I'm happy. I'm sorry for dumping all this on you and for making you worry." She added. I felt bad for not being there for her from the start. I was angry at myself for letting her go without a fight, for allowing my foolish pride for getting in the way. I should have listened to Emmett and Jasper. Wow, I never thought that I would voluntarily say those words, 'I should have listened to Emmett'. I shook my head and returned to the conversation between Bella and Charlie. She was saying goodnight and I asked for the phone.

"Dad hold on Edward wants to talk to you." And then she held out the phone for me.

"Chief, I wanted to say thanks. Bella told me that you encouraged her to come by so we could talk. I promise that if I had known she needed me I would have never left her alone for one minute. I'm sorry for letting her and you down. I'll take care of her and our baby, I promise. I just wanted you to know that, sir." For some reason it was important for him to know how much she meant to me and how much I wanted our baby. I had no plans to leave her ever, and I was damned sure never going to let her leave me ever again.

"Edward, I never doubted that you would love her and take care of her, or I would have never sent her to you, but thanks for the reassurances. I'll see you both tomorrow afternoon." And he hung up. Bella had a huge smile across her face, and I hugged her to me.

"I mean that Bella, you are my life now. You and our baby are all that matters to me. I'll take care of you both, and love you every day of my life." I kissed her and we both slid up to the head of the bed and climbed under the covers. She snuggled up against my chest and giggled.

"Bella, what are you laughing at?"

"I guess you were right Edward, we do need to get a larger bed. This one is so more comfortable, and we fit so much better." She giggled.

I laid awake listening to Bella sleep and rubbing her beautiful stomach. I have felt three kicks so far, and with each one my heart leapt higher into the air. I am sure that I have never felt anything so amazing in my life as my child kicking me before it's even born. I silently kick myself for not being with Bella the whole pregnancy. I can only imagine all the emotions that were going through her head when she found out she was pregnant. I'll ask her tomorrow about that day, I want to know everything about those months.

I slipped out of bed after hours of laying awake listening to Bella sleep. A melody had been playing in my head and I figured I would be able to sleep if I wrote it all down and got it out of my head. I quietly tip toed down to the piano. I hadn't sat on the bench and played for a while now. I can't really remember what drove me away from it but it felt like too long without it.

I began to play the notes as if they had always been there and I knew them well, when the words hit me to go along with the music.

To really love a woman, to understand, you gotta know her deep inside.

Hear every thought, see every dream and give her wings when she wants to fly.

Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms, you know you really love a woman.

When you love a woman, you tell her that she's really wanted

When you love a woman, you tell her that she's the one

Cause she needs somebody to tell her that it's gonna last forever

So tell me have you ever really, really, really ever loved a woman?

To really love a woman, let her hold you til ya know how she needs to be touched

You've gotta breathe her, really taste her, till you can feel her in your blood

And when you can see your unborn children in her eyes, you know you really love a woman.

When you love a woman, you tell her that she's really wanted

When you love a woman, you tell her that she's the one

Cause she needs somebody to tell her that you'll always be together

So tel me have you ever really, really, really ever loved a woman?

You got to give her some faith, hold her tight

A little tenderness, gotta treat her right

She will be there for you, takin' good care of you, you really gotta love your woman

And when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms

You know you really love a woman

When you love a woman, you tell her that she's really wanted

When you love a woman, you tell her that she's the one

Cause she needs somebody to tell her that it's gonna last forever

So tell me have you ever really, really, really loved a woman?

So tell me have you ever really, really, really loved a woman?

Just tell me have you ever really, really, really loved a woman?

Carlisle began to quietly clap his hands as I finished the song. I turned to see him approaching me. I moved over to allow him space on the bench beside me.

"Sorry I didn't mean to wake you, it just wouldn't leave my head." I shrugged.

"It's fine, the hospital called me actually so I only heard you after they called. I came down to make sure you were alright." He patted my back.

"Bella's home so I'm fine."

"Are you okay with all of this? Really? I mean this is a lot to take in within the time span of a few days. For both of you." His eyes voiced his concern.

"Yeah, you know I really think I am. It certainly hasn't been exactly to my plan but it is all part of my plan. I just need to spend some time talking with Bella, repairing our mistakes and trying to figure out how to make the future work. But other than that it's all a piece of cake." I smirked.

"Yeah, piece of cake. Okay, well just know that I am here if you need me. I'm gonna head off to bed since I now have to go into the hospital in a few hours. Good night son."

"Goodnight."

I spent a few minutes writing the song down in my journal before I lost it and then headed up to bed with Bella again.

I felt at home again when I slid into the bed and wrapped my arms around her. I can say with certainty that I really love a woman.

The morning passed quickly, the girls were off picking out things on the computer but when I noticed the time I knew we needed to get a move on. I knew that Bella would be anxious to get to Charlie's and was probably ready to leave. I found them still huddled over the computer, picking out furniture for the baby's room. Somehow Alice had convinced Bella to change the furniture from dark cherry wood to crisp white, and change the bedding from a neutral animal theme to pink girlie bedding set. I raised my eyebrow at Alice and she just giggled.

"Alice, do you know something I don't?" I questioned her, while glancing at Bella. Bella's face gave nothing away.

"No silly, well not officially anyway, but I just know that Bella here is carrying my little niece, so I decided that we needed to go with pink. You know I'm never wrong." She smiled and turned back to the computer. Bella just shrugged and stood up and hugged me.

"Where have you been all morning? I missed you." She pouted at me.

"Just writing a few things. Sorry time got away from me. I guess we had better get going or we're going to be late to Charlie's."

She grabbed her purse and we headed out the door. I helped her into the Volvo.

We drove in silence through town. Bella faced the passenger window and watched the rain drizzle down outside. I spent the time watching her as much as the rainy conditions allowed. Her silence didn't seem to be bothering her but I could tell something was on her mind.

"Mrs. Cope's house is up for sale. I guess she moved back to Seattle to be closer to her daughter finally. She has been threatening for a few years now. That's good, although I always did love that house. That's a shame to see it sold, I hope someone worthy buys it." Bella said with a touch of whistfullness in her voice.

"It was a nice house. I remember that time she invited us in after we did the caroling junior year. It had nice woodwork. Shame." I responded. It was nice to know that Mrs. Cope had finally gotten her wish to be closer to her daughter but Bella seemed sad for the empty house.

"Hey, beautiful, it's just a house, right?" I touched her hair and tried to cheer her up.

"Yeah, but it is a good house. A house that deserves a family, not some place that people throw down their things, use it for a little while and then move on when the need suits them. It should be loved and cared for." Her sadness mystified me but I do know that when the hormones take over to allow her to vent and help her feel better. Carlisle gave me that piece of advice during our Guitar Hero match.

"I'm sure someone who loves the house will buy it and make themselves and the house very happy. They will stay there for years. Cheer up angel." Her small watery smile did little to assure me she was in fact cheerful now. But I let it go.

I watched Bella as she cooked a grilled ham and cheese for Charlie. Charlie was watching the TV trying to catch the scores before he headed off to the station and spent the evening talking about who had the best chance for taking the World Series. He was always pulling for the Mariners, but I wasn't sure that this was their year; Charlie's faith in them never wavered. I just chuckled; I guess that's where Bella gets her unending faith from.

"Charlie, can I talk to you for a minute?" I walked towards the front door.

"Sure Edward is everything okay?" He stood and followed me to the door and we both stepped out onto the front porch.

"Charlie, you know that Bella and I came to talk to you and I'm sure she'll be angry with me for doing this without her, but I can't help myself. I feel like I need to talk to you and explain some things, you know clear the air so to speak. First I never knew that Bella was pregnant, if I had she would never have been left alone. I would have been there to take care of her. I love Bella and I'm sorry that she had to go through this by herself, but I would not change the fact that she is pregnant for anything in the world. I love our baby. I know I want to marry her, I have for a long time and I'm pretty sure that she wants to marry me. I think we have some more things to handle before that happens. I love her sir, with everything I have. I'll always take care of her, she will never want for anything. Like I said, I don't think we are ready for marriage yet, however I don't want to be away from her for a single second. I can't be anymore. I know that you don't have room for the three of us here but Carlisle and Esme do. We would like to stay there, together. I hope that we can be married before the baby gets here but I won't rush Bella. We can take our time with things and see how things progress. Are you okay with this?"

I knew Charlie was angry that Bella was pregnant and that we have obviously had sex. I also knew that he is still slightly angry at me for allowing Bella to walk away without a fight from me. If I had fought for her she would not have had to go through any of this by herself, and to tell the truth, I was still angry at myself as well. I would spend every day of my life making that up to Bella. And I would never allow her to make decisions for us again without being part of the decision.

He sighed and looked up at me. I met his eyes and prayed for the right outcome.

"Edward, Bella has told me the story and I'm sorry that she had to go through this as well. I have no doubts what so ever that you two are in love. Even though I would have liked for the two of you to be older when this situation presented itself, I'm also not in doubt of the fact that you two can handle it and will be fine. I give my blessing; in fact nothing would make me happier than to see you two together. Keep her safe and always make her happy."

"I will sir, I will. I can't wait to make this official, and I promise that I will make this official."

He nodded at me, "I know you will, you better."

We both laughed and left the front porch.

We spent awhile longer talking with Charlie and when he left for work we began to clean the kitchen. A silence settled over us as we clean, each of us involved in our own thoughts. Mine of how I could make Bella and our baby happy. I had no idea what her thoughts were about, something similar to mine if I knew Bella.

We drove home after the kitchen was cleaned and again Bella cried when we passed Mrs. Cope's house. The hormones were obviously working her into a weeping mess. I just held her hand and hoped that I would be able to help her feel better.

"I'm beat, I think I'll take a nap when we get home if that is alright with you." She quietly said as we pulled up to the drive to our house. My heart skipped a beat to realize that this was our house together.

"Sure, angel, whatever you want." I tightened my grip on her hand.

Once we entered the house it appeared that Bella would get anything but a quick nap. Emmett and Jasper were involved in a marshmallow fight, complete with guns that have rapid fire marshmallow bullets. Alice, Rosalie and Esme are marching back and forth from our room to the baby's room to discuss their plans.

"Hey guys, Bella needs to take a nap could you work on the baby's room now so she can get some sleep?" I asked them.

"Sure, just give us a minute." Esme absently minded answered.

Bella and I both drifted towards the bathroom to give them time. Bella splashed her face with water and brushed her teeth. I sat and watched her. We stalled as long as we could in the bathroom but we could still hear them chatting away in our room.

I pulled Bella's hand and led her into the room and towards the bed. "All right all of you out, she needs sleep." I left Bella sitting and pushed them out of the room and closed the door.

Bella smiled as I clicked off the light and lay down beside her. I lay on top of the covers, knowing we would not be sleeping if I lay under them with her. She was so perfect and I wanted to be touching her every minute of every day now that I had her back with me.

A few soft snores escaped her lips as she slept beside me. Once again a song was playing through my head, I closed my eyes and allowed it to fill my head. I just laid and listened to my heart's melody. Bella was obviously my muse. I sat up and grabbed for the journal to write it down.

Every time I see your face, my heart takes off on a high speed chase

Now don't be scared, it's only love, Baby, that we're falling in

I can't wait to tomorrow, this feeling has swallowed me whole

And know that I've lost control, this heart that I've followed

Has left me so hollow, that was then, this is now, yeah you have changed everything

Every time I see your face, my heart takes off on a high speed chase

Now don't be scared, it's only love that we're falling in

I would never do you wrong or let you down or lead you on

Don't look down, it's only love, Baby, that we're falling in

I'm standing in your driveway, it's midnight and I'm sideways

To find out if you feel the same, won't be easy, have my doubts too

But it's over, without you I'm just lost, incomplete

Yeah you feel like home, home to me

Every time I see your face, my heart takes off on a high speed chase

Now don't be scared, it's only love that we're falling in

I would never do you wrong or let you down or lead you on

Don't look down, it's only love, Baby, that we're falling in

All those nights I stayed away, thinking of all the ways to make you mine

All of those smiles will never fade, never run out of ways to blow my mind

Every time I see your face, my heart takes off on a high speed chase

Now don't be scared, it's only love that we're falling in

I would never do you wrong or let you down or lead you on

Don't look down, it's only love, Baby, that we're falling in

Don't be scared, it's only love, Baby, that we're falling in

Just as I finished the last word Emmett and Jasper crashed into my bedroom door, waking Bella. She sat up quickly holding her stomach. Her eyes were a mixture of fear and tears. I jumped up and opened the door.

"What the hell? Bella was sleeping, you both scared the hell out of her. Get downstairs and let her sleep, she is pregnant for crying out loud." I rushed back over to her and tried to soothe the worried look on her face.

Emmett and Jasper both took a moment to stop at the still open doorway and apologize for their actions. Bella soon settled back against my side and I held her as she went back to sleep.

An idea popped into my mind, so once again I slipped out of Bella's grip and marched downstairs in search of Esme. I found her in the kitchen and we made our way to my Volvo. I needed her help with this outing.